Jack and Ceres' Treasure
by CherryKiwi
Summary: cheesy music We're baaack! Jack comes back to town with an offer. :cough bad Cherry, very bad Cherry cough: No! Not like that!
1. Home, Sweet Home?

Jack and Ceres' Treasure By: ~Cherry~ and *Kiwi*. Duh! Who did you expect? The Boogie Man?  
  
A/N: This is our first Pirates of the Caribbean fic and we are greatly pleased! This is only our second fic ever though! Weee! We got our idea at 12:00 am (aka midnight.such a lovely hour.) No flames dangit! We shall send them back to the reviewer in hopes that it will burn them alive!! Muahahaahaha!  
  
Kiwi: Can I do the disclaimer Cherry?! Please Please Please?  
  
Cherry: Ok. Sure.  
  
Kiwi: YAY! Ok, disclaimer: We don't own anything except some stuff. Um yea, we don't own Pirates of the Caribbean *sobs* because we would greatly like to own Will and all his sexiness and Jack too. "Johnny Depp in eye makeup!!" quoth Cherry. Um, yea well anyway, our friend Mackenzie works at a movie theater and they got free yes, FREE Orlando posters *We want some!!* to give out. There were extras left over *omg, how can it be?!* and so she grabbed a few. She got on the elevator and her boss walked in. She had set the posters on this little cart she had to take somewhere and she noticed her boss walk off the elevator with a poster under his arm. She assumed it to be his but when she counted hers, she found that her boss stole one!! Yes, her boss, a GUY, took one of her Orlando posters. isn't it horrible?! Yes, well sorry this is so long, I had to tell you all that story.  
  
Flashbacks are in Italics., if they show up dangit!! //Thoughts// ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
Elizabeth Turner, wife to William Turner now, no longer just borrowing the name, stared quite dolefully out of the window in her bedroom at her father's house. Her hair was piled atop her head in a complicated and beautiful coif. She wore no makeup because her complexion was perfect; she didn't need anything to enhance it. Her dress was a rose colored silk, she even went to the trouble of wearing her hated corset. She was the English epitome of beauty and womanliness, and she looked as if her heart were breaking. Not that Will would notice. Will was not even around. He was the cause of her distress. You see, Captain Jack Sparrow had come to call. Elizabeth sighed. //It was a day almost exactly like this one.// *flashback!!*  
"Elizabeth!" Will burst into the parlor where Elizabeth sat sewing in contentment. She looked up at him expectantly to hear why he had come home from the forge so early. She was surprised to note that besides being his usual blacksmith sexy self, he looked rather agitated.  
"What is it, William? Has something happened?" She was concerned now, the picture of English domestic peace.  
"Something has indeed happened! Jack has come back to Port Royale!" Will burst out quite excitedly.  
"What?!"  
"I know! Isn't it wonderful? Finally we shall have a reprieve from this boredom!"  
"I don't want a reprieve from this boredom! Jack's coming back can only be trouble, Will! I hope he and his mischief stay far away from the both of us!"  
"Now that 'urts my feelings, Love. Don't wanna see ol' Jackie? I saved your life!" Jack slipped out from behind Will. Elizabeth was shocked and beyond words.  
"You-you-you brought that.that pirate into our house?!" She raised her voice at Will quite unlike a lady. That Jack had nearly gotten her killed as well she didn't think worth telling him; he never listened anyway.  
"Come on, Elizabeth! He needs some place to stay for just a while before he goes back to Tortuga with his crew. I told him he could stay here." Will tried to reason with her.  
"He can stay on his wretched ship! Wait! Did he bring the Black Pearl to Port Royale?! If the Commodore sees that ship he'll come here, Will! He knows you know him! And after that stunt you pulled when they were going to hang him, he knows you would shelter him if he were here!" She took a few gasping breaths, constricted by the corset and began to feel light-headed. Continuing to gasp, trying to get a sufficient breath, she grabbed the sewing table to keep her balance as she bent nearly double. Will immediately went to her to try and get her to sit down, and to loosen the corset, which the maids always seemed to tie to tightly.  
"Easy, Love! I ain't bringin' no trouble! I brought my new ship into port. Commodore wouldn't know it if the mast slapped him in the head, savvy? I cain't stay on the ship anyhow 'cause my business is on shore." Jack soothed with his words, well, he thought they were soothing anyway. But it didn't matter if his words had worked or not, for at that moment, Elizabeth feinted. **********  
//That was two weeks ago// Elizabeth sighed and shifted positions on the window seat. //Not such a very long time. If he were here, that is. // She sighed again and cast her gaze about the busy market street below her, searching the faces for one she knew wouldn't be there. For Jack had brought with him a story, a story and an offer for Will. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ All right people, here's the first chapter from Cherry herself! I left you with an Evil CliffieTM for a reason! Look at the bottom left corner of your screen. See that little button there? The one that says 'Submit Review'? Click the button! Review and tell us if you want the story continued or if we are wasting our time and precious ideas, Savvy? 


	2. Misspent Youth

Jack and Ceres' Treasure By: ~Cherry~ and *Kiwi* , which was expected…right??

A/N: Sorry for the long delay in the posting of this chapter, well, Cherry isn't but Kiwi made her help write this…but she came up with the idea for this fic a while ago when she was high on Raisin Bran or something.  Well that's what she said.  Well anyway, Kiwi is truly sorry and had to fight an epic battle to get this damn thing written.  You better review if you do read this.  It is nice to know that people do read, and if you are an author, you completely understand.

Disclaimer: We don't own shit.  You happy? [As you can tell, Kiwi is in one of her PMS moods (where P stands for permanent!)]  She has been randomly b****ing at people today.

Cherry note: Elizabeth will not be involved in this adventure as stupid ho's don't get to do stuff. 

A/N 2: Please remember, all random *s means a note at the bottom.  But of course, you all know that because you read our "The Fellowship Discovers Fanfiction" right? *hint hint*

*~*~*~*~*~*~* (omg, Kiwi's gimped computer recognizes the border!)

            *Flashity back*

            Will and Jack were discussing a very important offer that Jack had for Will.  They were sitting in the study of Will and Elizabeth's home and Jack was lounging a bit too comfortably on the nice furniture, getting his dirty feet on the upholstery.  Will sat behind his little desk that was totally customized with the latest quill pen out and personalized addressed stationary*.  Jack told Will of his latest adventures.

            "Well, I was sailing out at sea on me Black Pearl and I heard rumors of a treasure.  A GREAT treasure."

            "Ooooo" came an answer in reply, sort of muffled, from right outside the door, for the stupid ho was listening in on the conversation.  Will and Jack moved their eyes from side to side suspiciously.

            "Hmm, anyway, well, a treasure, you say?"  said Will.  "What has that to do with me?"

            "I thought you might like a take in it, savvy?"

            "Why? I am perfectly happy here reading my heart out and sponging off of her rich father!"

            "I thought you might like a vacation from your bonny lass?"

            "Bonny is not what I would call her.***"  A muffled "ugh!" was heard from the hall.  "Curse that stupid woman!  She's always getting in the way.  Jack, I want to be…FREE!"  Will sighed dreamily.  "We were so in love!  I thought marrying her would be lovely but after I married her, she changed.  She changed, Jack, she changed!"

            "Well, this is your opportune moment to get away!"

            "Um…I guess."

            "Well then, what are we waiting for?!"

            "For you to tell me about the treasure."

            "Oh, yea.  Almost forgot about that now.  We were sailing around about India and I heard a rumor about this lovely golden treasure stacked up in honor of some goddess or another by the name of Ceres.  Roman I think.  Known as Demeter to the Greeks.  Now, through a couple o friends of mine, I came upon a map to this treasure."

            "Well, sounds like an easy enough adventure.  Follow the map, get the treasure, and be home for dinner or divorce."

            "Will, you see here, there is a problem."

            "What sort of problem are we talking about here?  This better not be another 'corset-problem'.  There is always a corset involved somehow."  Will muttered to himself.

            "The only corset you'll be struggling with is a prostitute's if you have a mind for it."

            "Then what is the problem?"

            "Well, uh, good question.  We don't know.  My friends said there is a curse—"

            "Oh no, here we go again.  No more curses!! No more cursed treasure!!"

            "Hold on a minute!  If you could let me explain!"

            "Oh all right." Will said.

            "Alrighty then, the curse is that after you die, you'll be stuck in a lake of milk that recedes as you go to get a drink and Queen Anne chocolate Cherries will grow above your head and pull away as soon as you go to reach for them.  But I don't believe in after life so it's a moot point."

            "Uh, well then.  Sounds torment-full.  Let's see, rest of this life with Elizabeth or getting treasure then suffering in the after life that we don't believe in. Hmmm tough choice.  I think I will choose getting some nifty treasure then suffering in the afterlife we don't believe in."

            "Excellent choice!  Let's get going at once!" Jack said all too cheerfully.

OK here we go, here are the notes we made from the little *s that we mentioned.

* Imagery!! Oh God we paid attention in English class.

** Alternate ending: "B****, get away from the door! We are discussing important manly issues and if I have to get up from here, I swear you won't be able to sit down for three weeks!

*** Another alternate ending:  "Bonny?  She's a B****!!!" We love our alternate versions!

Ok we are sorry if that was too short. Please keep in mind that we do have time constraint.  You do want us to update some other stories too, right?? Well don't expect us to cater your every wish of chapters.  We're just not that nice.  J Review Damn it!  J


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